What Your Children Want...

I was in the middle of teaching a lesson on Active Listening to my Year 3/4 class from My Happy Mind when it hit me; so many adults don't really listen.

I decided to ask the children if they’d ever felt like someone wasn’t listening to them when they were speaking. I expected them to mention a friend, but the responses were eye opening. One child shared a story about showing their mum a picture they’d drawn. She was on her phone, barely glanced at it, and said, “That’s cool” before going back to whatever she was doing.

Suddenly, a wave of similar stories came pouring out from the class. One child even declared that Candy Crush was the worst game ever because their parents were always glued to it.

I could feel the frustration in their words, but it also made me reflect on the bigger picture. 

Does this sound familiar?

You’ve been at work all day, managing responsibilities, dealing with clients or colleagues, and then you come home, cook, handle household tasks, and eventually collapse on the sofa. 

Here's the problem, your children are watching and taking it all in. If this pattern continues, two things may happen:

1) Your children will stop trying to get your attention. They'll withdraw, stop sharing and before long you may wonder where they went.

2) Your children will learn what to do to get your attention-for better OR worse.

The Importance of Connection

At the end of the day, children don’t just want your attention, they want connection. And research shows that social connection is crucial for maintaining good mental health.

There’s a famous quote by Matt Kahn that says, “People can only meet you as deeply as they’ve met themselves.”

Simply put, if you want to build lasting, deeply connected, open, and loving relationships with your children, you need to start by fostering that connection with yourself.

This is the foundation of energetics and relationships; being fully present, not just with others, but with yourself.

The K'nnekted Method for Balancing Energy and Building Connection

From my own experiences, I’ve created a simple three step programme to help bring balance and connection back into your life, both personally and with those around you:

Step 1: Internally Balancing Your Energy It all starts within. In order to show up as the best version of yourself, you must first take care of your own energy. This means acknowledging your emotions, taking time to recharge, and practicing mindfulness so you can approach life with clarity and calm.

Step 2: External Boundaries and Self-Discipline Once your energy is balanced internally, you need to set healthy external boundaries. This means fulfilling your responsibilities but also creating space for joy, rest, and rewards. It’s about finding a healthy balance between work and play, and recognising when it’s time to switch off.

Step 3: Creating Calm, Connected Environments Finally, create environments, both at home and work, that encourage calm, connection, and openness. Everyone should feel comfortable being themselves, without judgement or pressure. When you master your energy, it will ripple out into the space around you, creating a harmonious environment for everyone.

Mastering your energy, your emotions, doesn’t just affect you, it affects the world around you, it is all interconnected.

By balancing your internal energy, setting boundaries, and creating connected environments, you can foster meaningful relationships and encourage positive growth in everyone you encounter, especially your children.

Find out more

If you’re ready to start your own journey of energy mastery, presently we offer two options:

1. Read Rachel's Book 'The Diary of an Awakening Mum' This is my personal story of rediscovering myself and leading myself from chronic anxiety to a place of inner calm. It’s a raw, honest account of my journey and the steps I took to find peace.

1. Book a 1:1 Reading In personalised sessions, we’ll explore your unique energetic blueprint and create a custom 3-step programme tailored to you. Discover how to harness your energy and begin your own transformation. You will work with Rach and Rich to ignite your ideas and then put a practical plan in place for you to work with.

The greatest gift you can ever give your children is the gift of your presence; mindful, balanced, and deeply connected. 

Staying connected with your children through the ups and downs of life, especially through the teenage years, requires consistent effort, presence, and understanding. When you master your energy, you become a model of calm and connection, guiding them through their own challenges. This creates an environment where they can thrive, knowing they always have your support and attention, no matter their age....

But, the most important thing is to give yourself the compassion you need first. There's always things we look back on and wish we'd done differently but the only thing that matters is NOW.